An English In Kentucky



















December 12th 2009

winter_cat.jpg (27989 bytes)

    There is tension between the Grey Cat and myself.  Not only does he blame me for the absence of his mistress but I have a growing sense that he blames me for the chill that now dominates the world beyond his cat flap.  

    For myself I have decided to create a block between sources that supply weather information and those parts of me that provide comprehension.  I will ignore a multitude of thermometers.  I will no longer reference the National Weather Service in the morning.  I will look at a clear sky and see stars instead of ice.  And I will put my coat on before I go outside.

    This location is a familiar one, I realize.  Last year I believe I did the same thing.  But I have no memory of the outcome, other than a belief that knowing the circumstances and experiencing the circumstances are almost opposites.



    The act of knowing requires access to memories, some of which with respect to cold, are not good.  And it is experience I would suggest that provides fodder for memory and thereby gives tone to the present.  

   So when I go outside I will imagine I am enthusiastically experiencing cold for the very first time.  I will put myself back inside that January ship galloping on the Bay of Biscay, but this year I will feel the cold with an insistence that it brings happiness and accord to me as an isolated and thoroughly selfish being.  And I will do this because last year I think I attempted martyrdom by trying to experience cold in terms of advantage to soil structure and active discouragement of pests and things that creep or buzz around in an irritating way.

   Possibly, when the Grey Cat's mistress returns, I will find myself lobbying for trips to mountain slopes where I might bath in snow drifts.  But more likely, when she returns, weather will warm and this will serve only to confirm the Grey Cat's opinion that I am the cause of his cold weather.

stove.jpg (32205 bytes)

tim candler

Previous  Next