An English In Kentucky


















April 2nd  2011    Tim Candler

    The newer modem is more like a Christmas tree than the old modem.  It has a great many tiny lights that sparkle and suddenly blink in that "I'm very busy" way, while the old modem sits in dark and silence.

    And of course the newer modem is what they call intuitive, which I will define as 'without instruction booklet'.  Perfectly possible, for those who need literature to go on line and download documents enough to occupy the evenings.  But what is to be done if on one side of the bargain intuition fails to achieve "connectivity".

     There is a telephone number to ring.  Smart Alec professionals out there who ask, "Have you switched it on?'  And strange how easy it is to convince oneself that a new device arrived already broken.

    If I had my life to live again, I'd try to find employment writing those glossy and colorful pamphlets that accompany intuitive products.  Somewhere in red letters, next to one of the pictures, I'd say, "Take a deep breath, smoke a cigarette and try to calm down."

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