An English In Kentucky


















January 11th 2011    Tim Candler

    This time last year water pipes to the kitchen were frozen.  Not sure whether I was the Old Me or the New Me back then.  Indeed I am not at all certain when the New Me emerged or why.

    I would like to think it duality of comparative self awareness, rather than a consequence of a schizophrenic episode.  There is Me, and on the other side there is what others see.  Clear enough in the grocery line when an eye wanders around the cart of another.  "Butter, eggs and chocolate." "Rice cakes, oranges and lettuce."  Then you wonder what "Canned soup, cat food and diet soda," might mean.

     The Old Me was a "Garlic, bacon and marmite," sort of person.  He'd sneer at "whole wheat flour, cucumber and brown egg" people and just to spite them he'd open the ice cream freezer causing it to mist up. Then he'd run down and destroy an aisle display because invariably his shopping cart had the wobbly wheel.

    The New Me is "hand-sanitizer, cotton balls and ear wax removal products," and sometimes he loiters near the "bacon, sausage and white egg" people weeping softly.

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