An English In Kentucky


















Monday November 28th 2011    Tim Candler

      I'll blame mental depletion for yesterday's failure.  It all happened so quickly.  The auditor asked questions, I answered them first by shrugging in that "who really gives a damn" way.  And then I noticed the clipboard and realized I was being subjected to that form of testing where the answer "who really gives a damn"  is abjectly incorrect.

      Nor was it one of those "multiple choice dog ate homework" situations.  Two of the questions permitted a degree of rambling, which is a good area for me so I was able to wax around until I saw encouragement in the face of my charming inquisitor. The other two questions were very specific, and required that part of memory that retains numbers. 

    All the same, it is a deficient mail order retailing associate who cannot recall the title of the shift he belongs to.

     Afterwards I found myself  debating the nature of  the competitive spirit.  I could see the importance of team, I could see the necessary disciplining of team and how critical to team it was that we all strive to out shine each other in the matter of team-ness.  It's a process that promulgates and directs our ambitions and our goals, when suddenly we find ourselves lumped together and also able to communicate.  So of course the one word answer becomes a symbol of perfection, a something we should all aspire to, a point at the end of the line.

     Sometime in the afternoon, I again  felt the tap of ungodliness upon my shoulder.  I guess the debate had deteriorated into an emotional confusion because I had made the stupid mistake of examining the word 'point' and it's relationship with an infinite line while tidying a bin full of  little fluffy toys with big eyes that were made in China and which were well labeled as 'lead Free.' 

    "Who fires who" sounds like a question, but actually for those of us in mail order retail, it's an answer.

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