An English In Kentucky


















Sunday February 3rd 2014  Tim Candler


     "Go to the ant thy sluggard, consider her ways and be wise." Not even this invocation from Proverbs has persuaded the Lady Bird on the table in the room where I sleep from mooning around on the mouse pad. Which is that flat surface a mouse requires if it is to sensibly move a curser around a computer screen.  And I guess the mouse itself might look rather like a very large Lady Bird relative who has to be tethered for its own safety. But I do not believe this is the  reason for such stubbornness from this particular Lady Bird. She will simply not be persuaded to move along, and even when I succeed in puffing mightily at her, next thing I know she has returned to her spot, which as it happens is precisely where my little finger taps the Morse Code during moments of what some might call reverie but which you and I know better.

      She is red and without spots. Which I think is unusual in her species. And I have to admit that many of her sisters have succumbed to this or that hardship afflicting lady Birds who chose to hibernate amongst people. There has been a random act by vacuum cleaner, for which I blame my own impatience, my own ludicrous territorial impulse and my developing allergy to Dust Bunnies.  A total over reaction on my part that followed a frivolity amongst the hibernators that required them to occasionally fly around the bedside light and then attempt nighttime cuddling in the warmth of the blankets under which I sleep. I have of course been racked by guilt and tormented by visions of Hoppy Bug hordes, even  though I was very careful to empty the vacuum canister in what I hope will be a more Lady Bird friendly environment.  I guess my best option now is to find another mouse pad and mouse, leave her to her own interpretations of whatever it is she thinks she is doing.


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