An English In Kentucky


















 Tuesday September 6th 2016Tim Candler9


     Dear Diary, today after much toil, stress and worry I became the proud owner of six ten foot lengths of seven eighth's of width steel alloy J channel in off white. And today, probably as a result of toil, stress, worry, aromas from rotting wood and Bumble Borer spittle I have the Head Spin. There's a technical name for it that's difficult to spell and sounds like the German for Sir, and under its influence a person can feel suddenly dizzy, staggers a little, feels as though he's going to fall over, his eyes feel as though they are fluttering, the more regular tone of his ringing in the ears changes pitch and invariably there's a sort of grunt. The first time this happens to a person, and if he makes the mistake seeking medical advice he gets his head x-rayed. Over time a rugged individual learns to adapt, he becomes stoic, and if I may say so, fairly heroic in the moping about sense. But the experience of it is one thing, what it looks like from the stand point of another is I begin to realize a little alarming at eight thirty in the morning, central time.



       The metal merchant was, as they say, "awfully decent." He mentioned something about having knocked a few back himself over the Labor Day weekend, he went on a bit about The Grind, and I felt quite manly sitting on the one chair hoping that my eyes, which felt as though they were fluttering, didn't look as though they were fluttering. When it came to the particulars of my order, fortunately I had it all written down, but the financial transaction which invariably requires me to remember a telephone number and street address hit a brick wall. My own relationship with the telephone is such that even under ideal circumstances this feat is never easy, and I guess in the end that's why people have business cards so they don't have to remember this sort of trivia so often demanded by the Social Fabric Destroying Business Study's Graduate. And again I was lucky, in the area of remembering telephone numbers it seems that buyers of metal building materials often forget their telephone number and the metal merchant is very adept at just making one up.


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