An English In Kentucky


















Wednesday April 25th 2018Tim Candler9


    Your correspondent has been promoted to Interim Primary Care Giver for two serial killers. A two week posting. It's a big responsibility that includes a scheduled flea treatment, which for those unfamiliar with this particular care giving procedure looks straight forward but can often result in serious injury and the possibility of Cat Scratch Fever, the symptoms of which include headache, chills, muscular pains, joint pains, arthritis, backache, and abdominal pain.




     And there's something about swollen lymph nodes, whatever they may be, as well as malaise, lethargy, indefinable bumpiness of the skin and general all around exhaustion. On reflection it's entirely possible I've been suffering from Cat Scratch Fever for some years now but with true grit and determination I've just been carrying on in an incredibly brave kind of way. But perhaps more important, if I was God, I'd strike down medical dictionaries, consign them to the fires of hell.