An English In Kentucky


















Saturday January 12th 2019Tim Candler9


     Balsa is in the Mallow Family. Like most flowering plants Balsa grows fast and we're talking 90ft in fifteen years. One of the things about Balsa wood is you can't really get your grubby little fingers on it by going to the mail order. The reason, for those of us who might be incredibly picky about these things, is that of the grades the grade that goes to make planks can often contain more harder bits than softer bits and vice-versa. And there's nothing worse than a harder rather than softer 1/8 inch plank when what you really want is 1/8 plank that's soft as cold butter. It's frustrating, can lead to tears and is a real downer on the Zen that flows through the modeler who might be wondering whether the USA would be better off with something like a Panda as its chief executive and maybe Koala Bears as the cabinet members. Oddly one of the Chinese Emperors eventually had to marry off his daughter to one of the Northern Clan leaders to prevent breaches to a border wall. They were a really very, very long way from Me Too back then, but no further away than say Abraham, you had to wait until the Medieval Girl Saints before there was even an inkling.   



     The point is, yesterday I broke the sole new year's resolution which was to attempt to cogently engage the English Language as it is written every day of the increasingly arduous year of Our Lord 2019. My excuse was the experience of crossing at least four county lines in search of a hands on Balsa Wood Shopping Experience. Fortunately the Artist accompanied me, she's pretty much a world traveler when it comes to stuff like crossing county lines, takes it in stride, is frighteningly relaxed and jovial. Nor was there any need for anything like access to a geo synchronized satellite, the device remained firmly locked in the Artist's glove compartment, which was a big relief because the Artist can get into terrible quarrels with technical devices, especially when they're offering suggestions. For my part I'd almost given up on finding Balsa Wood planks and had devolved into a possibly unfair critical analysis of modern day hunter gathering. Then there it was 1/16, 1/8 and 3/8 planks, and typical there was no 1/32 and no 1/4. Obviously it had been picked through, some of it dinged and all of it carelessly returned to the compartments by what could only have been a barbaric horde. 

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