An English In Kentucky


















Wednesday March 20th 2019Tim Candler9


    Sad day when any elected official uses the expression "Total Loser." Mind you, when it comes to the various blood oaths and chiseling commandments into stone your gardener endured during the winter months that whole Potato planting plan has gone totally to pot. "Not until April!" and "Only Red Pontiac" and "Don't plant until a warm Potato Rain is forecast." I guess the old man was up the mountain and there was a little Red Norland worshipping going on down here, and you should hear the total loser excuses that are currently emanating, while already plotting the excuses for Sooty Foot, Mop Head and that host of righteous neediness that travel the pathways in the toe nails of Moles, on the feet of Seagulls, in the proboscises of plant sucking insects, that fall from the vapor trails of private jets and arrive as the dust of shooting stars.    



     In the end it was temptation and blind obedience to routine in combination with that least of all reliable of organs, a narcissistic gut. I remember reading about a Soviet Scientist called Trofim Lyensko. He was a favorite of Stalin and he fell to the belief that geneticists were totally on the wrong track, and as head of agriculture Trofim had them all fired. His own theory was all about temperature at germination, no difference between Winter Wheat and Spring Wheat, and much more useful he reckoned on planting seeds much closer together to boost yield. Apparatus following temptation and blind obedience to routine swung into action. The result was famine! Not to be outdone one of Mao's advisers declared Sparrows a public enemy because of the number of seeds they ate, obvious really. Again, the Sparrow population was decimated, same result only this time famine was caused by locust. Who knew Sparrows eat more insects than they do seeds.  


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